Online dating has become a popular way for singles in India to meet potential partners.
With its convenience and accessibility, it’s no wonder that many people are turning to dating apps and websites to find love.
However, the virtual world comes with its own set of rules and etiquette to ensure that everyone has a positive and respectful experience.
Whether you’re new to online dating or looking to refine your approach, understanding the do’s and don’ts of online dating etiquette can make all the difference.
Do’s of Online Dating
Be Honest in Your Profile
Honesty is the foundation of any good relationship, starting with your dating profile.
Use recent photos that show the real you, and be truthful about your interests, job, and what you’re looking for in a partner.
If you’re 35, don’t say you’re 28. If you’re not into sports, don’t claim to be a cricket fanatic just to impress someone.
Being honest from the start helps you attract people who will like you for who you really are.
It also saves time and avoids awkward situations later on. It is important to note that the goal is to find someone who appreciates the genuine you, not a made-up version of yourself.
Write a Thoughtful Bio
Your bio is your chance to shine and show off your personality. Take some time to write something interesting and unique about yourself.
Talk about your hobbies, favourite foods, or a funny story showing your sense of humour. Instead of just listing things, try to give a sense of who you are.
For example, instead of saying, “I like travelling,” you could say, “I love exploring hidden street food gems in every city I visit.”
This gives potential matches something to connect with and talk about. Keep it upbeat – focus on what you love rather than what you don’t like.
Start Conversations with Personalised Messages
When you match with someone, take a moment to look at their profile before sending a message.
Find something specific you can comment on or ask about. This shows you’ve taken an interest in them as a person.
For example, if they have a photo of themselves at the Taj Mahal, you could ask, “I loved your Taj Mahal photo! What was your favourite part of visiting Agra?”
This is much better than a generic “Hi” or “How are you?”
It gives the other person something to respond to and helps start a real conversation. Put some thought into your opening message – it can make a big difference in getting a reply.
Respond to Messages on time
If someone has taken the time to write you a thoughtful message, try to respond within a day or two if you’re interested.
You don’t need to reply instantly but don’t leave people hanging for too long. If you’re busy, it’s okay to say something like, “Thanks for your message! I’m busy, but I’d love to chat more later this week.”
This shows you’re interested and respectful of their time. If you’re not interested, it’s better to politely let them know rather than ignore them.
A simple “Thank you for your message, but I don’t think we’re a good match. Best of luck!” is kind and clear.
Be Respectful and Polite in All Interactions
Good manners go a long way in online dating. Treat everyone you talk to respectfully, even if you are not interested in them.
Avoid using rude language, making fun of people, or being overly critical. If someone says something you don’t like, it’s okay to disagree politely or end the conversation if needed.
Don’t pressure people for personal information or photos they’re uncomfortable sharing.
Being kind and respectful makes the experience better for everyone and increases your chances of making good connections.
Take Your Time Getting to Know Someone
Online dating doesn’t mean you have to rush into things. Take your time to get to know the person you’re talking to.
Ask questions about their life, their dreams, and their values. Share things about yourself, too. This helps build a real connection and lets you see if you’re truly compatible.
Don’t feel pressured to meet up immediately or share personal details before you’re ready. It’s okay to chat for a while on the app before moving to phone calls or video chats.
When you meet in person, start with a short, casual date like coffee or a walk in the park. This removes the pressure and lets you see how you get along in real life.
Be Clear About Your Intentions
Being upfront about what you’re looking for in a relationship is important. Are you looking for something serious or just casual dating?
Do you want to get married someday, or are you not sure? Being clear about your intentions helps avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings later on.
It’s okay to say, “I’m looking for a serious relationship that could lead to marriage”, or “I’m just interested in casual dating right now.”
This honesty lets others decide if their goals match yours. If someone’s intentions don’t align with yours, it’s better to know early on so you can both move on to find better matches.
Keep an Open Mind
While it’s good to have an idea of what you’re looking for, try not to be too rigid in your expectations.
Sometimes, the perfect person for you might not fit the exact image you had in mind. Give people a chance, even if they’re not your usual “type.” You might be surprised by who you connect with.
Maybe someone is a few years older or younger than your ideal age range, or they have a different job than you imagined.
If you get along well and share important values, these differences might not matter as much as you thought.
Keeping an open mind increases your chances of finding a great match and can lead to unexpected but wonderful connections.
Prioritise Your Safety
Your safety should always come first in online dating. Before meeting someone in person, try to video chat with them to make sure they are who they say they are.
When you meet, choose a public place like a busy café or restaurant. Tell a friend or family member where you’re going and who you’re meeting.
It’s a good idea to arrange your transport to and from the date rather than relying on your date to pick you up or drop you off.
Trust your instincts – if something feels off, it’s okay to end the date early or not meet up.
Don’t share personal information like your home address or financial details until you know and trust the person.
Don’ts of Online Dating
Don’t Use Old or Misleading Photos
Using old photos or ones that don’t look like you is a big no-no in online dating.
Using that great picture from five years ago might seem tempting, but it’s not fair to your potential matches.
They’ll be disappointed when they meet you in person and realise you look different from your photos.
The same goes for heavily edited photos or using filters that change your appearance a lot. Stick to recent photos that show the real you – your natural smile, current hairstyle, and body as it is now.
Include a mix of face and full-body shots so people can get a good idea of your appearance. Honest photos lead to better matches and avoid awkward situations on first dates.
Don’t Ignore Red Flags
When you’re excited about a new match, it can be easy to overlook warning signs. But paying attention to red flags can save you time and heartache.
Be wary of people who are pushy about meeting up too soon, ask for money, or have inconsistent stories.
If someone refuses to video chat before the meeting or always has excuses for not meeting, that’s a red flag.
Trust your gut feeling – if something feels off, it probably is. Don’t ignore rude behaviour or disrespect, even if the person is very attractive.
It’s better to end things early than to get involved with someone who might be dishonest or treat you badly. Your safety and well-being should always come first.
Don’t Overshare Personal Information Too Soon
While it’s good to be open in your conversations, be careful not to share too much personal information too quickly.
Avoid giving out your home address, workplace details, or financial information in the early stages of chatting.
It’s also a good idea to keep your full name and social media profiles private until you’ve met in person and feel comfortable with the person.
When you do share personal stories, start with lighter topics before diving into very private or emotional subjects. This gradual sharing helps build Trust naturally.
Don’t Ghost People
“Ghosting” means suddenly stopping all communication with someone without explanation. It’s become common in online dating, but it’s not a nice way to treat people.
If you’ve been chatting with someone and decide you’re uninterested, politely let them know. You could say, “Thank you for chatting, but I don’t think we’re a good match. I wish you all the best.”
It might feel awkward, but it’s kinder than leaving someone wondering what happened.
If you’ve only exchanged a message or two, it’s usually okay to simply stop replying. But if you’ve been talking for a while or have met in person, a brief explanation is the respectful thing to do.
Don’t Be Negative in Your Profile or Messages
Negativity is a big turn-off in online dating. Avoid listing everything you don’t want in a partner or complaining about bad dating experiences in your profile.
Instead, focus on the positive qualities you’re looking for and what you enjoy. In your messages, try to keep the tone upbeat and friendly.
If you’ve had a bad day, it’s okay to say so, but don’t let your conversations turn into venting sessions about all your problems.
People are attracted to positivity and enthusiasm. Show interest in the other person and discuss things that make you happy.
This positive attitude will make you more appealing to potential matches and lead to more enjoyable conversations.
Don’t Play Games or Use Manipulative Tactics
Some people think playing hard to get or using tricks from dating guides will make them more attractive.
But in reality, these games often backfire. Don’t wait a certain number of hours to reply to messages just to seem busy.
Don’t pretend to be less interested than you are or try to make someone jealous. These tactics can be confusing and hurtful. Instead, be genuine in your interactions.
If you like someone, show it through your words and actions. If you’re not interested, be honest about it.
Straightforward communication is much more likely to lead to real connections than mind games. People appreciate honesty and authenticity much more than clever tactics.
Don’t Rush Into Physical Intimacy
Online dating can sometimes move quickly, but it’s important not to rush into physical intimacy before you’re ready.
Take the time to get to know someone well before getting physically involved. Ensure you feel comfortable and safe with the person and are on the same page about what you both want.
Don’t allow anyone to pressure you into progressing faster than you’re comfortable with. It’s perfectly fine to say, “I like you, but I’m not ready for that yet,” or “I’d prefer to take things slow.”
If someone doesn’t respect your boundaries around physical intimacy, that’s a sign they might not be right for you.
Don’t Ignore Your Boundaries
Getting caught up in trying to please a new match is easy, but don’t ignore your boundaries and values.
If you’re uncomfortable with something, whether it’s how someone talks to you or the activities they suggest, speak up.
It’s okay to say no to things you don’t want to do, even if you’re worried about disappointing the other person. Your comfort and well-being are important.
This applies to emotional boundaries, too – if you feel like someone is pushing you to open up about topics you’re not ready to discuss, it’s okay to say so.
Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries shows self-respect and helps build stronger, more balanced relationships.
Don’t Compare Your Dating Journey to Others
Everyone’s dating journey is different, and comparing yours to others can lead to unnecessary stress and disappointment.
Don’t worry if your friends seem to be having more success or finding relationships more quickly than you.
Focus on your path and what feels right for you. Avoid the temptation to settle for someone who isn’t a good match just because you feel pressured to be in a relationship.
Trust that the right person will come along at the right time.
Remember that many people only share the positive aspects of their dating lives, so you might not see the full picture of others’ experiences.
Stay true to yourself and your goals, and try to enjoy meeting new people and learning about yourself along the way.
Conclusion
Mastering online dating etiquette can greatly improve your chances of finding meaningful connections in the digital world.
Following these dos and don’ts will create a positive experience for yourself and others in the Indian online dating scene.
Be honest, respectful, and true to yourself throughout your journey.
Take the time to get to know people, prioritise your safety, and not be afraid to set healthy boundaries.
Online dating should be an enjoyable experience that opens up new possibilities for love and companionship.
With patience, openness, and good manners, you’ll be well on your way to navigating the world of online dating with confidence and grace. Happy dating!
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